I hope that everyone had a very nice holiday.
My husband and I drove down to Georgia to spend Christmas with my dad. This is the first Christmas since my mom died. We had all talked about it and decided we weren't really going to do anything. We'd just spend time together and have a nice dinner. No tree, no gifts, no decorations. Not this year. There really wasn't one specific reason for this - I'm not working, my mom not being here...it just seemed like the plan for this year. When we got to my dad's house he decorated the inside. It was really nice of him, but it upset me because he hung all of the stockings. My mom made new stockings for all of us every year. It was hard to see (in a good way). I cried a little. I saw that he stuffed each stocking with some stuff too. He said it wouldn't be right not to celebrate. I felt bad because I stuck to the original plan. Anyway...it was a very emotional day but a good one too.
My dad lives in a really small town out in the middle of nowhere. There are lots of places to walk so that is what I did every morning. I walked around 2.5 miles everyday. I felt great doing it too. Normally when we're there we sort of veg out. He lives on a lake and it's just like a nice little vacation. My dad walked with me a couple of mornings and it was nice to talk to him. I think that he was very surprised I could walk the distance (and at a good pace too). He quit walking after a mile - I would continue each morning.
After getting home from my walk Saturday my dad said he was really proud of me. He said that he would like to see me lose some weight. No shit sherlock. My dad and I have a really weird relationship regarding my weight. He doesn't understand what it is like to be heavy or struggle with weight. He thinks that you just eat less and exercise more and it all falls off. I've tried to talk to him and explain that a lot of my issues aren't only with the food and exercise. They are also emotional issues. He doesn't get it though. I've struggled with my weight my entire life. I don't know where it stems from and I'm trying to figure it out. So...back to my dad and his comment. I told him that I knew he'd like for me to lose the weight, I'd also like to lose it too. It's not like I love waking up every morning in this body. I explained that I didn't like to talk to him about it because of his lack of compassion/understanding and I think maybe he got it? I think since my mom died he's really trying to be a different person.
As my husband and I were leaving for home my dad said he was really proud and I should keep the walking up. I said thanks. I told him that when he calls he can't ask me if I've walked or how much I've walked because that will just annoy me. He agreed. :-)
We had a nice holiday all things considered.
I ate far too much and I'm hoping that I can break even for the month???? We shall see Wednesday.